Online dating does not work when you live in Saffron Walden. Only available 'matches' were Mike Wandering Hands Majors-ick, PC Doone-ick and a 'Mr. Barry' aka Barry the Blade-also ick! So have given up on that idea and have reluctantly employed Scarlet as Official match maker, will live to regret it. On the other hand Sad Ed has stuck with the online way, mainly because it means he does not have to leave his room, although he claims it is because he does not mind being with an older lady. I don't know what he is hoping for the older ladies round here are either mental (Miss Crawley) or lesbians (P.E. teacher Miss Beadle).

Sad Ed has sunk that low. We joining the online dating community. Hooray! And interestingly so is uncle Jim, he said he needs to move on from Marigold and find a real women, although I expect a lot of that is Mum talking.


But Mum can not know about this, she thinks everyone online is a paedophile and will probably set up a fake account to trick me again and attack me in Battleditch lane (strictly speaking she didn't attack me, but she did jump out and anyway I had Sad Ed there to protect me). Have sworn Uncle Jim and Ed to secrecy and am deleting our history just in case, (so her minion James doesn't find it and try and blackmail me again!)


 What is it with this family and deceitfulness? Ohhh maybe we could end up on TV...no would be Jeremy Kyle and even Thin Kylie thinks that is common! 

Told Sad Ed Grampa said to use online dating to find (emergency) new boy/girlfriend (girl for him, am not planning to dable in homosexuality again, as last time failed miserably). Sad Ed said he would never sink that low...

Told Grampa Riley about the Justin-boyfriend debacle. He said that Cosmopolitan recomends online dating to find some new 'arm candy'.

Why is Jack so minty with me? He is the one that left to go to Guatemala and who came back with a girlfriend! Is utterly unfair, how can he treat me like this? Justin is gloating though, he said that I will be forced back into his mince-meating arms once more, then said something so stupid, "au contraire acctually have new boyfriend and you don't mince meat anymore form Back doors band member midget does" to which he smiled and walked away! Why did I have to open my big mouth, and why does Justion have to keep coming back, can't he just stay at college and make my life easier!


Now have to find new boyfriend fast...